SS3 is a smaller orphanage with a little bit of a walk, especially when you’re carrying a five gallon bucket of paint. The first day we arrived to SS3 was to paint a small room; which, was an interesting experience. It started off ass all of the newbies applying the primer, while the ones who did it the year before played with the kids. Since there were only a couple of kids, some of us played various games with one another. Some helped the staff hang up clothes that needed to dry, and everyone waited to rotate in and out on painting.
It was interesting to see that some of the kids remembered us from the year before, and as usual every kid has a hard time with my name. I think it’s about time to get my Vietnamese name that they can all remember, then again I’m scared what they would come up with. I started off playing a game that seemed to be similar to our Sorry, a little bit different, but same in concept. As usual, in Vietnam rules don’t really apply, but it was still fun playing until they got bored. From there we kicked around various sorts of Vietnamese object, some of the oddest creations anyone has come up with, but at the same time they are awesome. I don’t know how to describe them other than a hacky sack with a feather, and a soccer ball that looks more like a tumbleweed. Since there weren’t that many kids around to play with, this time was more bonding with the translators, and coming together as a group.
Thank God this year we finally got some real paint, and we didn’t have to make our own paint brushes out of left over’s from the rice stalks. If you ever want a clear definition of what stubble is, and get a better idea of what the Hebrews in Exodus went through, let the Vietnamese show you what they use to paint with. This year we got real paint brushes, and real paint. We spent all the time before lunch applying as much primer as we could on the walls. The problem, was the heat mixed with the fumes from the paint in a small area made it so that you couldn‘t paint for too long.. Still, we trudged through it all, and some how got it done. After lunch a smaller group went back to finish painting as quick as possible, then the rest went on prayer walks. This year’s prayer walk was amazing, because everyone’s stories were a little bit different, but at the same time interconnected. Some, as they were praying about the drug situations ran into people trying to sell drugs, others ran into someone from the Bogotá’s, others felt a calling to go out to get some answers. I was able to pray beside one of our Vietnamese translators who wasn’t a believer; which, for me was difficult in trying to help him understand why exactly we were doing everything we were doing. After we all finished with our prayer walks, we met up to talk about what each experienced. I can’t fully describe in words how powerful this was, of all of our meetings nobody shared anything close to what was shared during this time. If you wanted a clear picture of how alive God is in Vietnam, all I can say is you should have been in the room during this time.
Finally, we took the kids from SS3 to water park. It seemed like there were more of us than there were of them, so for me it was hanging out with a couple of the translators. It took me a while with one of them to figure out if I was really listening to them or not. It’s easy to get caught up with everything you’re doing. The one that I hung out with most of the time at the water park was really worried about finding a host family for this next school year, so he could come to school here, but at the same time wanted to make sure I was having fun. While I played with the kids some, for me it was also figuring out that those translating for us are just as important as the little kids. While we have lightly hung out with them over the years, I can honestly say that it wasn’t near to the degree we did this year. I honestly assumed that most of them were Christians, while I knew there were a couple of them who weren’t the last few years, nothing to the degree of this year. As we were leaving for the airport, the guy I had been talking to a lot of the past few days expressed interest in going to TCU, but was scared he wouldn’t get in because he wasn’t a Christian. All I could tell him was to do everything he could to get in there, and then everyone will work on the Christian part later. I gave him a few email addresses of people to contact to help him write his papers to try and get in, and then told him to keep in touch. Unfortunately, the few that were beginning to ask questions, we had to leave just as we felt we were getting somewhere with them.
I’m really having to learn to just shut up and listen this year. I felt horrible as I missed dinner with Bic and her family the other night, as she had been planning this dinner for a while now. I came back to find out that I’d just missed them, and should have asked the front desk if they left me any information, but didn’t think about it. Still, it helped remind me of how wrapped up in things I am, and how busy I can make myself. Now as I get ready to leave things get a little bit harder. As almost everyone talks about being ready to go back, I’m thinking of how to get back to Vietnam. As I was talking with Brian about everything, he took it as there were a lot of things going on at home. While, there’s some truth to that, it’s more I love it in Vietnam. You become attached to everyone, and you don’t really know if you’re going to be able to come back the next year. I made by the grace of God this year, and have no idea what’s going to happen next year. I’ve been thinking of all of the amazing things that have happened this year, and have realized it was in the small things that the most joy occurred. It was the eating with the orphanage kids, the being invited to families houses, the conversations, the finding out how proud the kids in Sapa were of their new computer lab, and what everyone did in order to be able to hang out with us. It has been in this pursuit of being genuine, and not having a life filled with pointless rhetoric, the test has been just asking: did you miss it? I wonder how much this year I missed something. simply by losing track, getting caught up in things, and just not fully listening.
Friday, July 10, 2009
Monday, July 6, 2009
Monkies, Swan Paddle Boats, And Roller Coaster?
First off, we found all of the mosquitoes in Vietnam, they are in Dam Long or what ever the name of the places is. Yeah, the rooms actually had mosquito nets in them. Of course, I was too lazy to put mine up, let’s hope I don’t come back with malaria, but I guess we will know in the next 48 hours.
Spending time with the kids from SS4 was a lot of fun. The second they arrived we broke up into a couple of different groups, and began experiencing all the resort had to offer. As stated in the title, mostly crazy monkeys, the deer Sam didn’t eat in Sapa, Swan boats, a roller coaster, and swimming. I got the kid that didn’t really talk much, but enjoyed trying to go as fast as he could on the paddle boats, this followed a little girl that liked to hit me for some reason. Still, it was a blast. The kids kept trying to feed the monkeys, and then ran away when the monkeys chased them. It was an interesting experience, in the sense that now several people have an idea of what it’s like to establish relationships, and build them up like we have with the Birla kids. Tomorrow, those who started relationships with SS3 last year will be able to see how those relationships have progressed. The greatest part of everything was that many of the kids knew a little bit of English, so with our little Vietnamese and their English we were able to some what communicate.
It was at lunch, I was able to sit with some of the translators I hung out with the night before, and some of the kids that I’d been hanging out with that allowed me to get a better understanding of what it is we’re actually doing here. Yeah, we’re having fun, but we tend to miss the little things. At one point one of the kids made a comment, and I asked one of the translators what he said. Apparently the food at the resort was richer than the food he was used to. I never thought of it that way, because I’m used to even richer food at home. We began to talk about the differences in our backgrounds, and how he believed that just hanging out with the kids this one day actually makes a difference. We talked about how even the richness of the food motivates the kids to do better in school and to want something better for their lives. Here I’m just eating the food that is in front of me, but someone else is getting something from it. Without over exaggerating each little thing, how many other little things do we miss that actually makes a small impact on another’s life? After lunch we swam for a little bit, joked around with the kids a little bit, threw some of our own group members into the pool, threw some of the kids, and just had fun as if there weren’t really any barriers of having just met. We got cleaned up, and then had a few last minutes to hang out with the kids before they left. They fed us some rice cakes; which were like cardboard with caramel that stuck to your teeth like super glue, but it was still better than the dried fruit MiMi gave us. We took a few last photos of them, and then they headed to the buses to head back. Some of the kids immediately got on the bus, but others said goodbye and asked us to write them. It was a great experience, and went much better than I had anticipated.
I hope the little time that we’ve invested in these kids lives had made some kind of difference. It would have been nicer to have been able to spend more time with them, but you do the best with the little time you’re given. This portion of the trip took us out of our comfort zones just a little bit more, but it was very rewarding. Hopefully people don’t overlook at the things that can be taken from this experience. It has also helped me become closer to the translators. I was happy to hear one tell me that at the beginning I appeared to be a cold person, but once they got to know me, I was both funny and fun to be around. It’s nice to know that the people here don’t seem to judge you on their first impressions, but are willing to spend the time to get to know you. A lot of times you don’t really get that second chance. I wonder who feels more privileged to know one another, us or them? I’m fairly certain it’s them over us, and we’re hear to server them. When does the server become the served, and do we really notice it? They’re here showing us how wrapped up in our own little worlds we are, and we’re still to blind to see it.
We’re now back in Hanoi preparing to see how our relationships with SS3 have improved.
Spending time with the kids from SS4 was a lot of fun. The second they arrived we broke up into a couple of different groups, and began experiencing all the resort had to offer. As stated in the title, mostly crazy monkeys, the deer Sam didn’t eat in Sapa, Swan boats, a roller coaster, and swimming. I got the kid that didn’t really talk much, but enjoyed trying to go as fast as he could on the paddle boats, this followed a little girl that liked to hit me for some reason. Still, it was a blast. The kids kept trying to feed the monkeys, and then ran away when the monkeys chased them. It was an interesting experience, in the sense that now several people have an idea of what it’s like to establish relationships, and build them up like we have with the Birla kids. Tomorrow, those who started relationships with SS3 last year will be able to see how those relationships have progressed. The greatest part of everything was that many of the kids knew a little bit of English, so with our little Vietnamese and their English we were able to some what communicate.
It was at lunch, I was able to sit with some of the translators I hung out with the night before, and some of the kids that I’d been hanging out with that allowed me to get a better understanding of what it is we’re actually doing here. Yeah, we’re having fun, but we tend to miss the little things. At one point one of the kids made a comment, and I asked one of the translators what he said. Apparently the food at the resort was richer than the food he was used to. I never thought of it that way, because I’m used to even richer food at home. We began to talk about the differences in our backgrounds, and how he believed that just hanging out with the kids this one day actually makes a difference. We talked about how even the richness of the food motivates the kids to do better in school and to want something better for their lives. Here I’m just eating the food that is in front of me, but someone else is getting something from it. Without over exaggerating each little thing, how many other little things do we miss that actually makes a small impact on another’s life? After lunch we swam for a little bit, joked around with the kids a little bit, threw some of our own group members into the pool, threw some of the kids, and just had fun as if there weren’t really any barriers of having just met. We got cleaned up, and then had a few last minutes to hang out with the kids before they left. They fed us some rice cakes; which were like cardboard with caramel that stuck to your teeth like super glue, but it was still better than the dried fruit MiMi gave us. We took a few last photos of them, and then they headed to the buses to head back. Some of the kids immediately got on the bus, but others said goodbye and asked us to write them. It was a great experience, and went much better than I had anticipated.
I hope the little time that we’ve invested in these kids lives had made some kind of difference. It would have been nicer to have been able to spend more time with them, but you do the best with the little time you’re given. This portion of the trip took us out of our comfort zones just a little bit more, but it was very rewarding. Hopefully people don’t overlook at the things that can be taken from this experience. It has also helped me become closer to the translators. I was happy to hear one tell me that at the beginning I appeared to be a cold person, but once they got to know me, I was both funny and fun to be around. It’s nice to know that the people here don’t seem to judge you on their first impressions, but are willing to spend the time to get to know you. A lot of times you don’t really get that second chance. I wonder who feels more privileged to know one another, us or them? I’m fairly certain it’s them over us, and we’re hear to server them. When does the server become the served, and do we really notice it? They’re here showing us how wrapped up in our own little worlds we are, and we’re still to blind to see it.
We’re now back in Hanoi preparing to see how our relationships with SS3 have improved.
Are Your Eyes Open Yet?
Today we went to SS4, to begin developing new relationships. A lot of us thought it was going to be hard to develop new relationships, after being so attached to the Birla kids for the past 4 days. Before we even got off the bus, we could hear the kids singing, and one of the translators told us the song was about a girl who was looking for some one to love her. Immediately, it became clear that just like the Birla kids, all these kids wanted was for someone to love them. The rain and another group spending time with the kids allowed us to visit the babies. Of the whole experience, visiting the babies was the hardest. There were eighteen babies, and a couple of them were barely three weeks old. To make things even worse, we found out that most of them were abandoned and left there. Even still, the idea of this abandonment frustrates me. I try to view the glass as half full, and think that maybe they will be given a better chance at life, but how do you abandon something so innocent? I don’t really know what to do with babies, but still I and several others tried to show them as much love as we could, if only for a short time.
Once the group of University students finished up, we were finally able to meet the kids. We played some icebreaker games, and passed out beanie babies to the winners. Just like the kids at Birla, some of the kids began to find the person they wanted to hang out with. Clint actually found a kid who used to be at Birla orphanage; which, helped break the ice with some of the other kids. It was in poking them, giving high-fives, playing games, and asking them basic questions that made everything go better than everyone thought.
From there we headed to Minh’s farm; which, was much nicer than everyone had anticipated. We were greeted with a banner above the gate, and Vietnamese hats when we got off the bus. We were given the freshest green tea we have ever had, flan, yogurt, and milk. From there Minh’s mother greeted us, told us the history of the land, and let us know that it was Minh’s birthday. The whole experience was humbling, this guy who most of us barely know, cares more about our enjoyment, then us trying to do something for his birthday. I can’t tell you in full detail how beautiful this farm is, the view from the foot of the mountain was almost like being in Sapa. Most people who group up in these situations let it all go to their head, but this was the most humble family that I’ve ever met. His mother, a well known scientist, at one point even washed one of the ladies in the group’s feet. Again, there’s so much of the Vietnamese culture that I will never understand. We were fed an awesome meal, and then some local villagers sang and allowed us to do their traditional bamboo stick dance. (I don’t know what it’s called, but it was fun). It was overall a very humbling experience, knowing that I could never fully return the favor, and will probably spend my entire life in pursuit of being that humble.
Finally, after we got back to the resort we were staying at, we took communion together. It wasn’t so much the communion that was extra special, but what happened after. Some of the translators asked to see some of my photos from the years before, and one asked to read my previous blog. This time allowed me to share a little bit of what had been going on in my life, become closer with the translators, and explain to a degree why I love Vietnam so much. Still, the best was being able to read a portion of John with one of our close friends of 5 years here, and explain a little bit more of God’s love to her. It’s hard to help someone fully understand how much God loves them, and is looking out for them. How do you erase the fear of that person possibly loosing their family if they convert. I can only show them stories in the bible, tell them personal stories, and try to live as an example to help them out. This experience alone, was worth every penny of this trip.
While every part of me is physically exhausted, my mind is racing. We have talking about how people have been spiritually attacked this trip, and mine is much different this year. I have mental images of everything that happened over this past year, and fearing what lies next after I return home. There’s so much potential for next year, as I get ready to graduate, at some point in 2010, and all the doors that will open after that. The having to mind the wrongs I have done, and step up where I have failed before is definitely going to be difficult.
Once the group of University students finished up, we were finally able to meet the kids. We played some icebreaker games, and passed out beanie babies to the winners. Just like the kids at Birla, some of the kids began to find the person they wanted to hang out with. Clint actually found a kid who used to be at Birla orphanage; which, helped break the ice with some of the other kids. It was in poking them, giving high-fives, playing games, and asking them basic questions that made everything go better than everyone thought.
From there we headed to Minh’s farm; which, was much nicer than everyone had anticipated. We were greeted with a banner above the gate, and Vietnamese hats when we got off the bus. We were given the freshest green tea we have ever had, flan, yogurt, and milk. From there Minh’s mother greeted us, told us the history of the land, and let us know that it was Minh’s birthday. The whole experience was humbling, this guy who most of us barely know, cares more about our enjoyment, then us trying to do something for his birthday. I can’t tell you in full detail how beautiful this farm is, the view from the foot of the mountain was almost like being in Sapa. Most people who group up in these situations let it all go to their head, but this was the most humble family that I’ve ever met. His mother, a well known scientist, at one point even washed one of the ladies in the group’s feet. Again, there’s so much of the Vietnamese culture that I will never understand. We were fed an awesome meal, and then some local villagers sang and allowed us to do their traditional bamboo stick dance. (I don’t know what it’s called, but it was fun). It was overall a very humbling experience, knowing that I could never fully return the favor, and will probably spend my entire life in pursuit of being that humble.
Finally, after we got back to the resort we were staying at, we took communion together. It wasn’t so much the communion that was extra special, but what happened after. Some of the translators asked to see some of my photos from the years before, and one asked to read my previous blog. This time allowed me to share a little bit of what had been going on in my life, become closer with the translators, and explain to a degree why I love Vietnam so much. Still, the best was being able to read a portion of John with one of our close friends of 5 years here, and explain a little bit more of God’s love to her. It’s hard to help someone fully understand how much God loves them, and is looking out for them. How do you erase the fear of that person possibly loosing their family if they convert. I can only show them stories in the bible, tell them personal stories, and try to live as an example to help them out. This experience alone, was worth every penny of this trip.
While every part of me is physically exhausted, my mind is racing. We have talking about how people have been spiritually attacked this trip, and mine is much different this year. I have mental images of everything that happened over this past year, and fearing what lies next after I return home. There’s so much potential for next year, as I get ready to graduate, at some point in 2010, and all the doors that will open after that. The having to mind the wrongs I have done, and step up where I have failed before is definitely going to be difficult.
Saturday, July 4, 2009
Am I Grown Up Yet?
This year's Birla experience was an amazing one. Once you step off the bus the kids greet you as if you've never left, or as if you have been there a million times before. Once you get done with the meeting with Dipp, you are playing with the kids, and finding the kid who will be attached to you every time you come to Vietnam.
As soon as everyone arrives at Do Son the true experience begins. It's the putting on the talent show, the smiles, and the truly deep down caring about you after just meeting you that means so much. It’s the immediate genuine relationship that is amazing. Your kid chooses you, not you choose the kid. You can initiate the friendship to a degree, but in most cases the kid immediately finds you. After that, it’s playing slap games, picking them up to get fruit off a tree, sitting on the curb with them, eating next to them, and watching them as they swim at the beach that makes the bond grow even more. For a few days that kid is your kid, and they become like family. Not only is all of this going on, but for the first time we were able to eat with the kids; which, I can’t describe to you in words how amazing it was. Yeah, they finish in a few minutes, but they’re waiting for you out side when they finish. (Don’t ask me why they don’t just continue to wait at the table.) The more you have been, the more kids you hang out with. Even a little poke or hug, you’re able to show you care. If for thee days we can take them away from the pains of their every day life.
It was the words of the little girl I have been watching for three years that started tears. I was able to talk to her for the first time through Bic, one of our friends/translators. She asked me, “am I grown up yet/bigger yet.” I said yes, and told her the changes that I had noticed since the previous two trips. I myself began to wonder how much I have grown over the past few years. It’s easy to add qualifiers to make myself feel better, but I wonder how much the people here and at home have seen me change. Even before the trip I have been wrestling with this question. The past year has been hell, with more digression than progression in most aspects of my life. Almost every part of my world has been rocked by some event this past year. It’s easy to come here and put on the image of growth, but deep down what true change has happened? It’s in questions like these, the theme of figuring out how to be genuine in our relationship has resulted.
This trip has baffled me even deeper than before. It’s the people in the village picking corn from their stalks and feeding it to us, and a little orphanage kid buying me a snack to make sure that I’m happy. They’re giving me from what little they have, and I’m barely giving a fraction of what I have. My mind has been boggled by this, I understand the economic gap between Vietnam and the United States, but I don’t think I will ever understand how they can be so openly genuine to relationships. It’s this lack of understanding that has caused a lot of frustration. It’s easy to put a blame it on where we live, easy to put blame in wrong places, than just to blame ourselves. Rhetoric is starting to frustrate me, because we don’t follow it up with action. I’m constantly reminded of James 2:14-26. Even before I left Jeremiah 29:13 has also been constantly going through my head. “You will seek me and find me, when you seek me with all your heart.” The last four words are the most difficult.
Wrapping everything up with Birla Orphanage was difficult, and it never gets any easier. Our bus ended up being fairly late, but because of this we were able to do a prayer walk around the orphanage while the kids ate lunch. After lunch, we were able to play with the kids until it was time to go. Some of the girls that I spent time with this year went back to their rooms to avoid the emotions of saying goodbye. Me and Hi are still to young to understand what’s going on, but one girl gave me a hug and begin to sob. It was difficult trying to keep my composure, to avoid making things worse. If for only three days we’re able to bring joy and happiness to these kids. Finally, we pulled away and begin to pray for them. By the end, I don’t think there was a dry eye on the bus, or a person who wasn’t touched by the experience.
I must admit, I don’t think this trip would have been near as successful if it wasn’t for our awesome translators.
As soon as everyone arrives at Do Son the true experience begins. It's the putting on the talent show, the smiles, and the truly deep down caring about you after just meeting you that means so much. It’s the immediate genuine relationship that is amazing. Your kid chooses you, not you choose the kid. You can initiate the friendship to a degree, but in most cases the kid immediately finds you. After that, it’s playing slap games, picking them up to get fruit off a tree, sitting on the curb with them, eating next to them, and watching them as they swim at the beach that makes the bond grow even more. For a few days that kid is your kid, and they become like family. Not only is all of this going on, but for the first time we were able to eat with the kids; which, I can’t describe to you in words how amazing it was. Yeah, they finish in a few minutes, but they’re waiting for you out side when they finish. (Don’t ask me why they don’t just continue to wait at the table.) The more you have been, the more kids you hang out with. Even a little poke or hug, you’re able to show you care. If for thee days we can take them away from the pains of their every day life.
It was the words of the little girl I have been watching for three years that started tears. I was able to talk to her for the first time through Bic, one of our friends/translators. She asked me, “am I grown up yet/bigger yet.” I said yes, and told her the changes that I had noticed since the previous two trips. I myself began to wonder how much I have grown over the past few years. It’s easy to add qualifiers to make myself feel better, but I wonder how much the people here and at home have seen me change. Even before the trip I have been wrestling with this question. The past year has been hell, with more digression than progression in most aspects of my life. Almost every part of my world has been rocked by some event this past year. It’s easy to come here and put on the image of growth, but deep down what true change has happened? It’s in questions like these, the theme of figuring out how to be genuine in our relationship has resulted.
This trip has baffled me even deeper than before. It’s the people in the village picking corn from their stalks and feeding it to us, and a little orphanage kid buying me a snack to make sure that I’m happy. They’re giving me from what little they have, and I’m barely giving a fraction of what I have. My mind has been boggled by this, I understand the economic gap between Vietnam and the United States, but I don’t think I will ever understand how they can be so openly genuine to relationships. It’s this lack of understanding that has caused a lot of frustration. It’s easy to put a blame it on where we live, easy to put blame in wrong places, than just to blame ourselves. Rhetoric is starting to frustrate me, because we don’t follow it up with action. I’m constantly reminded of James 2:14-26. Even before I left Jeremiah 29:13 has also been constantly going through my head. “You will seek me and find me, when you seek me with all your heart.” The last four words are the most difficult.
Wrapping everything up with Birla Orphanage was difficult, and it never gets any easier. Our bus ended up being fairly late, but because of this we were able to do a prayer walk around the orphanage while the kids ate lunch. After lunch, we were able to play with the kids until it was time to go. Some of the girls that I spent time with this year went back to their rooms to avoid the emotions of saying goodbye. Me and Hi are still to young to understand what’s going on, but one girl gave me a hug and begin to sob. It was difficult trying to keep my composure, to avoid making things worse. If for only three days we’re able to bring joy and happiness to these kids. Finally, we pulled away and begin to pray for them. By the end, I don’t think there was a dry eye on the bus, or a person who wasn’t touched by the experience.
I must admit, I don’t think this trip would have been near as successful if it wasn’t for our awesome translators.
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